Prague, Part 1

A last minute flight deal and an acute onset of guilt that I hadn't been taking advantage of my time abroad prompted me to jump on a flight to Prague last Friday.

I was welcomed onto the plane by a screaming, undermedicated child. I have beliefs that the Swiss are undermedicated in general, but I will get into that later. The mother, who suffered from jaw-dropping stunning Czech features, wore an el-gigantor diamond ring which she wielded like a weapon and was able to successfully defuse the anger of the plane with her flirty smile on multiple occasions. I was notified by her child's 130db scream that we had begun our final descent.

Fantastic weather and a 1 dollar:22 koruna exchange rate greeted me. I piled into a cab that was blaring Red Red Wine and observed a landscape that looked much like Montana. Set on a plateau northwest of the city, you can actually see the curvature of the earth from the airport. Nervous that my cabbie was taking one too many random turns, I checked the signal strength on my cell phone. Images of my limp, lifeless body dumped in the middle of a Prague alley -- still on hold with the police -- flashed through my mind.

I was dumped at the Best Western Premier Kinsky Gardens hotel 600 koruna lighter. I unpacked and headed out the door, not realizing that I wouldn't return for another 6 hours.